It’s National Mutt Day
Lukas is the classic definition of a mutt. While we know his "top” breed is Greyhound - we only know that for 15.8% of him. For 32.9% of him, the report from The Dog Aging Project came back as “Unknown.”
I love every one of those bits in Lukas - especially the Unknown. All of those little portions made the fabulous dog that I trust completely. After all, he is the dog who helped me mend my broken heart after my dog, Bono, passed (exactly 6 years ago today - synchronicity!), then broke my leg to help me out of a career that burned me out, all the while showing me how to discover all the unknown bits of myself so I could love them too.
While there is always the physical mutt I am - a hodge podge of ancestries - the “mutt of me” I’m talking about is the mixture of light and dark within myself. The parts of me that are at ease and the parts that are at dis-ease. This latter bit is where Lukas expertly shines a light so I can see how I carry feelings of not being worthy, good enough, lovable or secure. The light he brings spotlights where I can bring my own in an effort to see these negative beliefs, compassionately understand their hold on me so that ultimately, they can leave the shadow and integrate into my light.
Here’s a recent example of how Lukas does this for me.
While I was out of town visiting family, my husband called to say that Lukas had a bad day at daycare. The facility owner said that his anxiety was getting worse and she didn’t think he was having fun with them anymore. I was upset by this news because after a year of really good reports, the most recent being 3 days prior (!), I felt blind-sided.
I quickly tuned into him, asking “what happened at daycare today?” and heard, “I’m fine. (insert the eye roll he showed me). It was loud and I got nervous and she doesn’t get me. I’m fine.” As he said all of this, I sense of calm and assuredness flowed through me. I didn’t give it another thought.
Until the facility owner emailed me.
The message immediately kicked my Not Worthy negative belief in overdrive. I could feel myself wanting to respond with what Lukas had said (she doesn’t believe in animal communication), share what I know about him (I’d done that before to little avail), and how he’s also working to help her with her stuff (like with this!). But I knew from all of this work with Lukas that my retort wasn’t going to make a bit of difference. The “light” for me in this moment, was recognizing all the ways my Not Worthy was kicking in and what I could learn from them.
I turned back to Lukas. This time, I also asked my colleague, Kate Foggo, to talk with us for our upcoming episode of Making Light:Two Humans Being. (available Friday, August 4, 2023) Because I’m so emotionally tied to Lukas, my feelings can block my intuition when it comes to hearing his lessons for me. In asking Kate to join us, it helps keep my “channels” open.
As Kate spoke with him, Lukas shared that his “anxiety is seen as misbehaving. I’m really not as fragile as they think I am.” (I can attest to that for him and relate to that for myself!) “However, mom, you don’t have to take this personally. There is nothing wrong with me or that place. I’m fine and their response doesn’t mean you aren’t.”
Ooooph. That hit home.
Still, I said to him, I think we should look for a new day care. He responded “When you do, use this as an opportunity to state exactly what I like and don’t like (ie crates, being left alone) and don’t accept anything less than what YOU need from them. Then share all of your thoughts, verbally, with me, so that you don’t get stuck in your head trying to solve the problem. Your head is where “Not Worthy” lives, not your heart. Use our conversation as a way to really feel if the place is right for you - and me.”
Ahhhh-ha. That felt true - especially the bit about saying exactly what I need, that’s something I’ve been working on of late with Lukas’ help. This latest installment of the lesson and homework didn’t surprise me. In fact, it empowered me. So much so that we’re visiting a new daycare next week - one that has already passed round one of my list of needs.
Happy Mutt Day to you all! May your Mutt friend help you discover, examine and love all the pieces and parts that make YOU the one and only very unique and special YOU.
